He said “wasn’t looking for anything serious.”

Diagnosis

Neither are you. Which is why you are now looking at the 45-minute drive to the nearest animal shelter, for reasons you will describe as “just to look.”

Treatment

You are not going to argue with him about commitment. You are going to go somewhere a small mammal will commit to you on sight. You are “only looking.” You are absolutely getting a dog. His name will be something dignified, like Gerald, and Gerald will never once say he is not looking for anything serious, because Gerald is looking for everything, immediately, all the time, at your feet.

Before you leave, check the shelter’s visiting hours and adoption process. Bring someone sensible if you have one, and make the actual decision with your home, budget, and schedule in mind. Gerald deserves a stable situation; the man who inspired this field trip has already demonstrated the opposite of one.

If today is only a visit, that still counts. Write down the questions you want answered and come back when you are ready. If a dog does come home, set up the bed, leash, collar, and tennis balls before the first dramatic announcement to the group chat. Search “animal shelter near me” now. Bring the leash you have not bought yet but will. A new pet is a real commitment, so give the decision more than one afternoon and a man’s bad sentence.

Fill Your Prescription

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• optimistically sized dog bed
• dog leash and collar
• breed guidebook
• tennis balls

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Side Effects

There may now be a dog. This was always going to happen. He was just the excuse.